I Didn’t Like My Parents as an Adult, Now I Wish I Had More Time With Them.

It’s not always easy to love your parents once you’re grown. You start seeing their flaws more clearly. You remember the things they didn’t say, or said too harshly. You set boundaries. You pull back. Maybe even resent them for not being the parents you needed.

And then one day… they’re gone.

And suddenly, the things you thought didn’t matter start to sting. This isn’t about guilt-tripping anyone. It’s about perspective. And what we might wish we’d done differently, before it was too late.

The Reality: You Can Love Your Parents and Still Struggle With Them

Adulthood often brings clarity, and pain. You might realize:

• They weren’t emotionally available
  

• They dismissed your dreams or compared you to others
  

• They said things that stuck with you longer than they ever knew
  

It’s valid to feel hurt. And it’s also okay to pull back when you need space. But what if that space never gets closed again?

A Real-Life Example: Anna’s Story

Anna didn’t have a close bond with her mother. They argued often. Her mother never praised her, only criticized. By the time Anna was in her 30s, she rarely visited. She thought:

“We just don’t get along. That’s life.”

Her mom passed away suddenly from a stroke. No warning. No last words. Now Anna says:

“I wish I’d asked her more questions. I wish I’d tried to understand why she was like that. Maybe she was just doing her best with what she had.”

It doesn’t erase the pain, but it added regret to it. And that’s the part that lingers.

When They’re Gone, You Stop Fighting, But You Also Stop Healing

Death has a strange way of ending the argument—but also cutting off the chance for growth.No more awkward calls. No more debates.But also… no more apologies. No more shared laughter. No more little chances to understand each other.

Sometimes we think we’re protecting ourselves by staying distant. But in hindsight, we were also cutting off potential healing.

If You Still Have the Chance: What You Can Do Differently Now

If your parents are still here, and the door isn’t completely closed, here are small ways to reconnect without losing yourself:

• Ask about their past, not just their opinions. “What was your life like when you were my age?”
  

• Send a photo or memory out of the blue. “Remember the old me?”
  

• Visit, not to “fix” things, but just to be present.
  

• Write a letter to them that you may never send, just to release your feelings. Then, you can leave it in a drawer or discard it.

If They’re Gone: You Can Still Heal

Regret doesn’t have to turn into shame. You can still:

• Talk to them in your own way (letters, prayers, journaling)
  

• Forgive them, without forgetting what hurt
  

• Break the cycle so your own children experience a different kind of love
  

• Honor their memory in a way that feels true to you
  

Conclusion:

Disliking your parents as an adult doesn’t make you ungrateful. It makes you honest. But don’t let that honesty keep you stuck in silence, bitterness, or unfinished business, if you still have time to rewrite the story.

Because many people who lost their parents too soon would give anything for one more imperfect conversation.

Written with Passion by: HappierHomes Admin